Soul with a body

Soul with a body

You are not Karen; Karen is the name that was given to you.

You are not a mother, brother, sister; those are roles you have assumed in this life.

You are not male or female; those are apart of the body and vessel you arrived here in.

You are a soul. You are a soul that has a body.

Your body does not define you. Your body is a vessel that was given to you. You were given one vessel in this lifetime and it is your choice to decide how you will treat it. Your body is an external reflection of what is going on with your internal state.

If you are ridden with guilt, anxiety, chaos and this will be how you experience your body and the rest of your life. This same chaos will threaten the other areas of your life. You are unable to compartmentalize yourself in how you show up.

The mind of chaos, the mind of peace, the mind of love, the mind of gratitude, the mind of anger, all of these are states that will create in your physical form. Have you ever noticed that when you’re mindset is in a state of disease you experience tension, and even injury?

If you are unable to see that the vessel is showing you a clue of what you have going on with your mindset you will push it out farther and begin to create this same sensation in your life. This will show up as broken down cars, angry relationships, slow Wi-Fi and spilled coffee. The life you are living is a reflection of your internal state.

You take yourself everwhere.

What if the slow or crashing Wi-Fi is look at as a signal vs. a nuisance? The universe is sending your soul and your body a signal. Slow down. Hear the internal screams for silence, peace and needing a break.

Treat your body with kindness. You, the soul, are creating the perfect signals to guide you. It is up to you to look at them as directions instead of life sentences. Listen to all of the chatter that you allow yourself to believe. Would you say the things you say to yourself to your best friend or your mother?

The current injury, size and weight does not define who you are. These are just the current state of your experience.

You are not the body, the vessel is where you live.

And so it is.

she is art.

she is art.

Stand for and foster the feminine energy within your partner.
Allow her to explore the raw, unbound, fierce, goddess that lies behind her conditioned smile, hardened eyes and quieted energy.
She will push and she will test. It will not be easy to watch her unravel.
Stand.
Be purposeful, strong and at peace. She will mirror you.
Stand at her side, patiently holding space until her fierce pours out.
The disentangle goddess will love like the wind. Bold and storming and in a minute the gentle breeze over a silent lake.
Stand.
Mirror her strength while standing in your own. Don’t allow her storm to disturb, clot or sway the goddess behind the wind.
She is
The creator.
The healer.
The warrior.
The lover.
The confusion.
The beauty.
The Wellness Way

The Wellness Way

I am a fitness professional, I train my body both with stress and rest, I track my macros, I sleep, I drink enough water, I follow all of the instructions of “what to do” and yet, I felt like health should be easier than what I have been doing. I was still not able to sleep, had gas, having a hard time breaking plateaus, carried a lot of information, brain fog and digestion problems.

In October of 2018 I jumped and I decided I wanted to take my health to the next level. I wanted to identify why my body was acting up and was not operating at its highest level. I had been visiting Integrated Functional Health in Bettendorf Ia. I had some dramatic improvements and shifts in my body by working with Matt DeWild and he recommended I look into the work that Dr. Stacey Wiley at Complete Balance Chiropractic was doing with The Wellness Way.

I dove right in.

Dr. Stacey is a chiropractor that works through a system call The Wellness Way. She is amazing, personable and understands the real life application of trying to heal from the inside out. This system starts with testing. She will not treat without doing testing. There are no guesses or adjustments to programming without looking at the data first.

I followed Matt’s instructions and emailed Dr. about what I was looking to heal. She personally got back to me in less than 6 hours and then asked me if I would rather text her. I got a phone appointment that next week and we talked through the testing kits she would have me do.

I had to have my blood drawn by a local lab and then I completed 4 stool samples and sent them off to the lab as instructed in the testing kit. It would take 1-4 weeks to get the results back from the two labs.

My blood results came back the following Monday and she immediately got in contact with me because the results show that i didn’t have an intolerance or allergies to food (which i had been tested for before), but i had the antibodies for 17 different foods. All of which I had consumed the weekend before.

Antigens:

Having the antigens for foods means that when I consume them my body believes that they are a virus and attacks them vs. warding off many of the other viruses that we come into contact with. (This explains the years and years and years of constantly becoming ill). I have been in a constant state of war.

The biggest hurdle would be switching up my routine to accommodate new foods and avoiding this list:

  • Almonds
  • Beef
  • Casein
  • Crab
  • Egg Whites
  • Egg Yolks
  • Lobster
  • Cows Milk
  • Mustard
  • Peas
  • Peanuts
  • Pork
  • Scallops
  • Sesame
  • Soybean
  • Tuna
  • Bakers Yeast

I tackled this head on and communicated with the people in my life so they would know how best to support me through this discovery and learning process. I got to play with this for 3 weeks prior to my other test results coming back.

At this time i met with Dr. Stacey in person and we would talk about the supplements to add my routine to help combat.

The remainder of my test results would reveal that I did not have a candida problem (had always been told that this was an an issue), but i didn’t have a high count for a different yeast in my intestines (dysbiotic flora). Some of the symptoms that I experience from this internal yeast infection include: inflammation, gas, cramping, normal disturbance, fatigue, ear infections, acne and brain fog. I also found out that my immune response is upgregulated the tissue in my GI track is normally the first immune barrier and mine was angry!

In December I started on a course of supplements to help start to tackle and bring my system better into balance. I still track my macros and eat all the foods but now these things are added in to help out. I have 2 courses of supplements I take when I wake up and when I go to bed and then every time I eat i take a few supplements to help break down the food and help start to tackle the yeast.

When I first eliminated the foods that were on my list I immediately began to notice differences. I am less puffy, I can sleep better, I have no gas, and I am able to focus better. Spiritually, a whole different connection to my mind/body experience is different and a lot of fun. The cheetah print on my skin has started to change. The spots on my arms would turn red or purple at least 1 time per week if not every day. For the past 3 weeks they have been white.

on my skin has started to change. The spots on my arms would turn red or purple at least 1 time per week if not every day. For the past 3 weeks they have been white.

I am not perfect with all the foods but I avoid my list 85% of the time. It takes time to look at labels but once I learned what things work for me I have been sticking to those items. Aldi has been the cleanest grocery story to find things at and Thrive Market online has been a savior.

The Wellness Way has clinics all over the country and I would recommend checking them out if you are curious of how to optimize your body. Going through the hard time to walk out on the other side healthier has been worth it. This journey is not over with and I will update you along the way.

Fear and Love

Fear and Love

“Love never brings fear, for fear is always related to punishment. But love’s perfection drives the fear of punishment far from our hearts. Whoever walks constantly afraid of punishment has not reached loves perfection.”
1 John 4:18

What is it you’re afraid of? What has you awoken at night or stressed during the day? What brings your soul anxiety?

Fear and love cannot be mixed together. They are like oil and water. They don’t mix. Could it be, that the fear you feel is just a place where love is not?

What if instead of fear, stress, anxiety, you delve into the realm of complete love knowing that you are in fact, a beautiful soul who is worthy of such love? knowing that, before you ever do anything good or right, you are loved? Knowing that you do not have to do anything, or be anything, that just as you are, right in this very moment, you are loved. You are perfect. There is no ifs, ands, or buts. There is no maybe later I can be deserving of love. there is no, if I get it right next time I will be deserving of love. These are all expectations we place upon ourselves to create the illusion that we can control who and what will love us when… When we are ready to love ourselves. Fully.

What if we took the areas in our life that are incomplete and we engulfed those areas in love? What would happen? Even the areas of our life we don’t like. Our procrastination, our doubt, our sickness, our hurt we wish would go away … Could we choose to own it. Own our doubt. Own our procrastination. Own our sickness and choose it. Not allowing ourselves to be victim of our circumstances but instead, taking ownership for the reality we see.

And still loving ourselves through that.

Could we possibly become fearless when we consume our hearts and lives in all the utterly gross places of ourselves that no one else knows, could we then choose love?

In choosing love, fear has no place.

Complete. Beautiful. Ownership. Fearless. Love.

Resolution vs. Intention

Resolution vs. Intention

Lets set INTENTIONS instead of RESOLUTIONS.

Resolution is an acknowledgment that something is wrong and trying to fix the past. The past does not exist. The past only lives in our memories. We have choice to set all of those memories aside and decide how we want to show up moving forward. You no longer need to carry that experience from your childhood or last week into your future.

Your way of being was built as a protective mechanism so you would not have to feel like something was wrong, you were not good enough or that you don’t belong. These beliefs no longer serve who you are becoming.

Having a clear vision of what that looks like is setting an intention to live into.

Setting an intention is being free to create your life as possibility.

Setting an intention is having integrity with the current situation.

Setting an intention is knowing that the universe/god/your guides/etc. will guide the path for your greatest growth. You may not know how and now it’s time to choose the “what”.

The path and days to your intentions may not be of least resistance but it will be perfectly set up for you to grow the most and become who you were meant to become.

This year I am choosing to have an intention to live life as unreasonably and sweet as possible.

And so it is.

Love Knows No Bounds

Love Knows No Bounds

Love is like an open hand filled with Play Dough.

The Play Dough can take any shape it wants in an open hand. It can take the shape of heart, pet, house, friendship but it knows no bounds in an open hand. It can spread and it can grow. It can be thick and thin.

Love, like an open hand of Play Dough, knows no bounds, beginning or and end. If you allow it to “just be” it then it will continue to grow.

Love doesn’t know restrictions or space.

When you put restrictions on it and start to close your hand it seeps out in all the spaces you don’t want it.

Just like you do not love one child more than another, you cannot force another person to love in one way. You cannot control their love and you cannot force them to start or stop. When you begin to try to mold love it comes out in all the spaces you don’t want to.

If a relationship ends, the love does not end. The relationship changes and the love continues.

Love is in a friendship, it is in the heart of a pet and it touches us. If you are able to accept love for all that it is and all that it isn’t, then love knows no bounds.

And so it is.

Top 5: Online Dating Tips to “Hook” the One

Top 5: Online Dating Tips to “Hook” the One

These are 5 things that will help set your online dating profile apart for the mediocre and help you communicate who you are through the screen.

I was on vacation alone in Fort Lauderdale, FL (I do this every other year) and I decided to take myself to dinner. I put on a favorite dress and a pair of new pink flip-flops and allowed Google to give me walking directions to a restaurant on the causeway.

The staff seated me on the dock at The Pirates Republic while the owner of the restaurant suggested a meal for me. My back was facing towards the restaurant and I sat in peace, drink in hand, watching the sun set over the water.

My time alone turned into a dateless date when three hilarious gentleman were seated behind me. I could tell by their voices that they were in the age range of 55-65 and then then one of their son’s who was 20 joined them.

Information Gathered:

  • Man A: In a relationship with a woman from Michigan and happy, had experience dating online, had been on 52 different coffee dates and owns his own yachting company.
  • Man B: The father of the 20 year old,  currently on Match.com, having a hard time finding someone, owns a construction roofing business. Felt like women only showing pictures of them in exotic places is fake. He felt like he had “thrown back” some of the good fish to keep some bad. He is convinced that Midwest girls are sweet and yet hard working.
  • Son: Working as a roofer and was out of his previous relationship but still talked to his ex girlfriend every day. Convinced that girls from Wisconsin are crazy.

As the evening evolved these three made me laugh and their advice to each other and conversation were pure GOLD. Man A was trying to give advice to Man B about what to do with his Match.com profile to get him to stand out.  The three decided that you shouldn’t marry someone unless you’ve been together for 5 years and been living together for 18 months.

I paid for my meal. I got up to leave and finally got to turn around to see the faces of the three men. I thanked them for making my evening very entertaining.

I told Man A that I had double the number of first dates that he had been on. They were so intrigued, they asked me to join them. I confirmed and suggested to all three that coffee dates are the perfect way to meet someone. You can tell if they are interest within the first 5 minutes, so there is no reason to spend more than $5.

To Man B, I began to describe the   “big 5” that I suggested he needed to include in his dating profile.

These are my 5 things to include in your profile:

  1. A non negotiable
  2. Something that you do daily
  3. How to describe you personality
  4. Something you hate/strongly dislike
  5. Something that will make them think or research.

I described to the group how I would have put these into practice.

  1. I would include that fitness is a non negotiable, but the way I would describe this in my profile is bold and direct.  “I workout daily and if you don’t currently lift I’m likely stronger than you. I am also a personal trainer but not yours.” This describes that I mean business and that I am not interested in adding clients.
  2. “I meditate daily.” This describes that this is a huge part of my life and if it doesn’t match their view point it could be a point of contention in the long run.
  3. “You could describe my personality as Jameson on the rocks.” I wouldn’t say why but this leaves it as a conversation starter. I asked someone how they would describe me and this was PERFECT so, I ran with it. I suggest you talk to a sibling or a best friend and see what they say.
  4. “I HATE the dishes.” I think this is not only funny but starts a relationship/conversation with a new light. This is something you know about yourself and at some point you are going to be able to say, “Remember in my online profile, when I said i hated _____, I wasn’t kidding.”
  5. “RFFYM, and I cook accordingly.” This stands for Real Food Fits Your Macros. If someone didn’t know this expression they would have to look it up but also would get a good idea about how I eat and that I can cook. If they get to this point and they actually research the topic… they are probably pretty interested and are likely to start up a conversation.

Overall there are plenty of things that you can include but setting yourself apart from the masses will allow you to sort out the individuals that are not actually interested. I also suggested that you talk about yourself vs. what you’re looking for.

If they don’t like what you have to say then it doesn’t matter if they can keep up. Don’t be general, be specific so both of you can move past the “fluff.”

I quickly helped Man B talk through some starting points. He started with this list:

  1. He likes someone shorter than him.
  2. He likes a Midwest girl because he feels like they are hard working and sweet.
  3. He likes to travel but appreciates more of the adventurous spirit vs. the lavish.
  4. He loves to spend time with his kids.
  5. Dating is expensive
  6. Work around the house is something he enjoyed.
  7. Enjoyed his construction company

This list turned into the following

  1. A non negotiable
    • My kids come first.
  2. Something that you do daily.
    • Construction is my life; I am always looking at the way things are built or the next project.
  3. How to describe you personality
    • You can describe my personality as a 6′ gentle giant. (This way he could talk about how he is kind but also likes someone that is a bit shorter than him).
  4. Something you hate/strongly dislike
    • I hate lavish meet ups that don’t go anywhere. Let’s actually go somewhere, coffee and a stroll or drive. You pick the spot.
  5. Something that will make them think or research.
    • Favorite Midwest City is Chicago.

I made sure they knew that they needed to set standards for both themselves and a partner. Take a serious look at their online profiles and don’t just say “Hey”. She is never going to respond if that’s all you say.

I feel like the few minutes I spent with them made an impact and they not only laughed but also will take a serious look at their online profiles.  Be strong, have conviction and don’t settle.

Prior to leaving, I looked at the son and said. “I am from Wisconsin, we are not all crazy.”

Featured Photo: Jameson on the rocks, a whole red snapper at the Pirates Republic in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. The atmosphere is relaxed, the food is fantastic and the staff are top notch! I recommend everyone check this place out!

It is all in the context

It is all in the context

BACKGROUND:

The reality is that I hate doing the dishes but I also use an insane amount of Tupperware during the week. When I get home every day from work I have about 3-5 bags with me that I dump in the living room. I don’t wash the table besides once a week. I wash my hair maybe 2-3 times per week and shave my legs probably 2 times per week. My kitchen is tiny and I live alone.

When I am around my friends they see the chaos and the mess in the kitchen but if you open the fridge it is organized AF!!!

I do chores throughout the week but typically wait for Friday night clean up all the dishes. And by Sunday the house is ready for another week of messes.

WHAT HAPPENED:

A relationship had developed from strictly fiends to potentially more. (It’s all in the context). He has only seen me as the hot mess friend. A whirlwind of dirty hair, gym clothes, Tupperware and an artistic flare. As soon as the context changed… I changed.

I walked into the house and found it in its typical messy insanity. Dishes everywhere and out of order.

In the context of friends… he had seen my house a mess and me in just sweats, wet hair and glasses.

Now in this new context of possibly moving the relationship from friends to potentially more the mess wasn’t presentable.

I walked in and there is a mound of dishes! I knew I didn’t have time to wash them so… this happened.

Yep… I shoved all the dishes underneath the sink. Then there were still more dishes so I filled my work cooler. I dry shaved my legs, put on clean clothes, took down my hair (this never happens), wiped down the table, shoved my work bags into a closet and started cooking for us.

It is amazing what you will do to look good in fear of looking bad. I am writing this and laughing at myself. I am committed to showing up as the real human. No more fear, just reality.

And so it is.

Fear is Excitement without Breath

Fear is Excitement without Breath

I have been taking with a lot of people about fear recently and then a wonderful woman in my life talked about excitement and it all fell together. Fear is what holds us back and keeps us small. Our ego steps in whenever their is opportunity for growth and brings up the fears around that potential growth. You have to be able to take the leap, be unreasonable and trust that on the other side of fear will be growth and a world of wonder that you would have never dreamed possible.

Fear is healthy but also is an opportunity. Fear is what makes you act in actual unsafe situations. But, with practice you will be able to determine what is unsafe vs. what is ego.

Your natural fight or flight does not need to be activated all the time. Fight or flight is your entire system being in a state of excitement. Your senses are heightened and you are READY. In this situation you are without breath. You are only in action mode. In danger this is perfect because all you can do is act. When you start to feel this excitement I challenge you to take a breath.

Take a breath.

Bring yourself back into your body.

Question if you are actually in danger.

Question the way ego is keeping you small.

Question what would your life be like if you acted out of excitement vs. fear.

When you are ready to grow you will come RIGHT up to the edge of change. You will be in a state of excitement. Ego will step in and tell you all the reasons that you should not take the action to move on the other side of the line.