When I saw this photo of myself I was taken by the intensity. And, I immediately knew the intimidation, confusion and curiosity I have invoked in so many people along my path. And then, I saw this poem and so many things clicked for me.
Much of my dating experience has been a whirlwind of unavailable disappointments. Some relationships lasted years and yet didn’t fulfill me. Other short lived relationships were wild interactions of passion and curiosity. People have wandered into my life, and then wandered out and after what seems like endless first dates, dating has become relaxed and a game of curiosity. There are no reasons to be nervous when you know yourself well. Old nerves, frustrations, lies and cold heartedness only mirrored my own emotional and physical unavailability. Healing and learning were my responsibility. Allowing my walls to soften and my femininity to enter, vs. the masculine that was demanded of me, all had to be learned.
There’s still hope inside this heart knowing that my deepest desire is to be in a relationship. One that feeds my soul and challenges my wandering spirit.
When I saw this poem by Allison Nappi so many things became clear to me. Understanding more of myself in the totality of what it means to be a mystical woman gave me an understanding why relationships haven’t worked. This delightful poem revealed what it’s like to actually be with me.
The seer of possibilities. My optimistic attitude can be “annoying” after a while and it is my trust in the universe to provide everything that needed and wanted. We have been custom designed to be exactly where we are in the moment and no matter the frustration, excitement, love and passion that is in the moment, we are divinely meant to be here.
The unraveling of where we are only gives truth and foundation to where we are going.
And no matter how much the human confusion runs rampant in my life, I will only see possibility for myself and the humans that choose to walk by my side.
The divine female is the untamed storm of clarity. No matter how much you want to ground your roots, when you truly choose to encounter the storm it will be a wild ride until the winds die down and clear skies of hope are all that remain.
Dating a mystic can’t be easy and it will be worth it.
Photo by Kat Lennartz